Yeah, this is super annoying. I want to try out roleplaying and get into character and all that, but in some tables you have people like the following:
The involved roleplayer who, despite their intent otherwise, takes control of the narrative. They try to involve you, but it always feels like you’re a side character in their story.
The funny guy, who tries to crack jokes and make the whole game feel light-hearted and silly. I get we’re all here for fun, but sometimes I’d like a bit of meat to bite into.
The GM’s friend, who derails the game into taking about that cool dog that they had when they flat shared last year. No seriously, it’s a cool dog. Let me find a picture on my phone.
That guy whose character is a reference to that show you don’t watch. They keep making references to it, and a few other people get it, but you have to awkwardly nod your head.
… Wow, sorry, kind of went on a rant there. I guess I have a bit of frustration at going to play a game, and most of the session being taken up by not playing said game.
For real though, he is not there for the story or the rp, he’s there to rage out and fight. Meanwhile I’m doing shitty voices and putting on a full Oscar worthy performance.
There are such broad dynamics between what players want, and I fucking love how flexible D&D is for that.
Reading your list makes me better understand why I get kicked out of groups… I never realized that being the jokester actively harmed people’s ability to enjoy the game. Thank you for that.
There’s a group that would be annoyed by immersion-breaking 4th wall jokes, and there’s another group that would be relieved by the tension and pressure to perform being broken. Everyone’s going to have slightly different comfort levels so there’s always some compromise on the tone of a campaign.
A session zero is basically a meeting where the DM and players talk about what kind of campaign they will play, the setting, whether the game will be more combat or RP heavy, whether it will be serious or humorous, topics or themes they’d rather avoid and those they’d like to explore, and maybe a bit about the player characters and how they fit into the story. It’s a good chance to get to know the other players and see whether you’re a good fit for the group.
I’d personally want to support making the player characters during session 0 (maybe not the full character sheet, but at least personality/background and class).
I’ve done campaigns where everyone came into the session 0 with their characters all ready to go and the idea of the characters being adjusted wasn’t really brought up but more the rest of the aspects you mentioned. Differences and some antagonism between characters can make things really interesting, but at least in one of them two of the characters fundamentally wouldn’t ever be in a party together. One of the players felt some cognitive dissonance in wanting their character to stay in the party, but not being able to find a rational reason they would, and kinda had to retcon their character.
Yep, that makes a lot of sense. Making an entire character can take quite long, so I try to do it outside of group sessions especially with new players, but some aspects should be talked through with the group.
Thank you so much for this link! I’ve never realized before that RPGs are meant to be grounded characters in fantastical scenarios and that players have real connections to their characters. I’ve always viewed my characters as disposable and cannon fodder for risky scenarios.
In my experience, having a person who turns the game into a joke makes it less funny than if it was just played straight. The game is naturally funny and absurd in ways that are best highlighted when the narrative is taken somewhat seriously.
To be clear, it’s fine to be light hearted and jokey, perhaps most of the time depending on the group.
Knowing when to turn on and off Serious Mode is a skill that can be hard to develop, and IMO it’s perhaps the GMs job to gently say when they want things to be serious.
I guess for me in my last campaign, it was less that I was trying to be a jokester and more that actions which seemed somewhat reasonable to me and high-risk/high-reward were not welcomed by the rest of the group and I didn’t realize how serious people were going to be. We were playing in the world of Firefly and I tried hailing an approaching ship to see what they wanted and if I could negotiate.
The fact that the DM was shocked should have been a hint that I was doing the wrong thing, but at the time I thought that I found a plot hole and was doing such a good job that the DM was blown away. I was wrong and my character has incapacitated by another member of the crew, which continued until I realized that I probably wasn’t welcome to continue campaigning with the group. When I realized this, I genuinely felt really bad that I’d probably upset the group, but it wasn’t until now that I realized how seriously people take this.
I’ve never before played with the specific intent of keeping my character alive, but I think that was more of a videogame mentality. Other folks in the group aren’t exactly excited that I’m putting their characters lives on the line because people obviously invest real time and care into this. My realization was less that I joke too much and more that I don’t take things seriously enough.
That honestly doesn’t seem that bad. It might not be a smart thing to do in the grand scheme of things, but I can see it being an action that a naive member of the crew would do. I think if that truly was the wrong thing to do, then the GM should have stepped in and said something like “Are you sure about that? This region of space is notorious for having lots of pirates around”. Being shunned from a group for something like that feels a bit unreasonable, IMO.
I’m sure there was more to the story than that, but I’m an awkward person. Oh well. Live to try again another day, hopefully better and with more patience for people like me next time. Thanks again!
This is where setting rules or just finding a group who agree on the tone of a game is important. However, even in that some people will have things they do want to role play like shopping. Well be a good role player and make it interesting for them or even turn that shopping into something more. Ask the shopkeep if there’s anything he’s wanted that’s super rare (relic hunt quest), or straight up leave the store. It’s role playing go to a different part of town, you don’t spend 100% of your time irl with anyone why do that in a game? Cause havoc, or don’t, jump into the sewer, fascinate the locals by setting off fireworks or do spells, go to a bar get drunk and do role play karaoke while the guy shops. Have fun, it’s your role play too
I’m so thankful that we have none of these people in my group. We’re all about the same, with similar interests, and similar play styles. The only drawback is that we all lean towards resolving situations diplomatically, which means our adventures can lack combat for quite a while, unless we’re in a straight-up dungeon. Eventually someone will get bored and go with “I stab him in the fucking face!” Which ends our diplomacy for a while.
Sounds remarkably similar to my group, but in our latest session it was a kpop video, not a dog
I long for a normal Dungeons and Dragons campaign with a nerdy elf wizard and a sneaky halfling rogue and a chivalrous human knight and a devout dwarven cleric being an adventuring party instead of a loose collection of ideas and concepts with no depth or cohesion. I want to be able to ask someone why they’re with the party and get an in-character answer instead of the player saying they need to be for the story to happen. I want the possibility of a TPK because the DM understands the characters and give us appropriate challenges, I don’t want any semblance of a challenge disappearing because the DM feels bad about dealing damage to his girlfriend’s character
Yeah, this is super annoying. I want to try out roleplaying and get into character and all that, but in some tables you have people like the following:
… Wow, sorry, kind of went on a rant there. I guess I have a bit of frustration at going to play a game, and most of the session being taken up by not playing said game.
Meanwhile I just want to hit things with my greataxe. I don’t care about RP or rules so much. Just let me hit things with my orc barbarian please.
Ah, I see my husband has made a Lemmy account.
For real though, he is not there for the story or the rp, he’s there to rage out and fight. Meanwhile I’m doing shitty voices and putting on a full Oscar worthy performance.
There are such broad dynamics between what players want, and I fucking love how flexible D&D is for that.
You know what women in Italy in the renaissance did to their husbands who displeased them? Used aqua tofana to solve that problem.
“… a strong poison created in Sicily around 1630…”
“It was a colorless, tasteless liquid and therefore easily mixed with water or wine…”
Vizzini never had a chance.
Definitely something to keep in mind the next time he denies me the standing ovation I deserve for my performance. 💅
Players get mad ate when I say this because we’re ‘playing an rpg not a number simulator’
Just make him 8 int and 8 cha so no one asks you do anything important except smash. Thats what i do.
I wanna hear more about the dog…
Reading your list makes me better understand why I get kicked out of groups… I never realized that being the jokester actively harmed people’s ability to enjoy the game. Thank you for that.
It harms THAT SPECIFIC PERSON’S ability to enjoy the game. Your group probably enjoys you if you guys play together regularly.
Yeah it’s a “read the room” kind of thing.
There’s a group that would be annoyed by immersion-breaking 4th wall jokes, and there’s another group that would be relieved by the tension and pressure to perform being broken. Everyone’s going to have slightly different comfort levels so there’s always some compromise on the tone of a campaign.
Gonna say they probably don’t if they’re consistently getting kicked out of groups
Nah, depends on the group. And the jokes.
Should have session 0 to set a baseline tone.
Please explain! This sounds fascinating
A session zero is basically a meeting where the DM and players talk about what kind of campaign they will play, the setting, whether the game will be more combat or RP heavy, whether it will be serious or humorous, topics or themes they’d rather avoid and those they’d like to explore, and maybe a bit about the player characters and how they fit into the story. It’s a good chance to get to know the other players and see whether you’re a good fit for the group.
I’d personally want to support making the player characters during session 0 (maybe not the full character sheet, but at least personality/background and class).
I’ve done campaigns where everyone came into the session 0 with their characters all ready to go and the idea of the characters being adjusted wasn’t really brought up but more the rest of the aspects you mentioned. Differences and some antagonism between characters can make things really interesting, but at least in one of them two of the characters fundamentally wouldn’t ever be in a party together. One of the players felt some cognitive dissonance in wanting their character to stay in the party, but not being able to find a rational reason they would, and kinda had to retcon their character.
Yep, that makes a lot of sense. Making an entire character can take quite long, so I try to do it outside of group sessions especially with new players, but some aspects should be talked through with the group.
Thank you!
https://slyflourish.com/running_session_zeros.html
There’s a ton of really useful stuff on this page and some links that are worth a read, especially Monte Cooks’ consent in gaming pdf
Thank you so much for this link! I’ve never realized before that RPGs are meant to be grounded characters in fantastical scenarios and that players have real connections to their characters. I’ve always viewed my characters as disposable and cannon fodder for risky scenarios.
In my experience, having a person who turns the game into a joke makes it less funny than if it was just played straight. The game is naturally funny and absurd in ways that are best highlighted when the narrative is taken somewhat seriously.
To be clear, it’s fine to be light hearted and jokey, perhaps most of the time depending on the group.
Knowing when to turn on and off Serious Mode is a skill that can be hard to develop, and IMO it’s perhaps the GMs job to gently say when they want things to be serious.
I guess for me in my last campaign, it was less that I was trying to be a jokester and more that actions which seemed somewhat reasonable to me and high-risk/high-reward were not welcomed by the rest of the group and I didn’t realize how serious people were going to be. We were playing in the world of Firefly and I tried hailing an approaching ship to see what they wanted and if I could negotiate.
The fact that the DM was shocked should have been a hint that I was doing the wrong thing, but at the time I thought that I found a plot hole and was doing such a good job that the DM was blown away. I was wrong and my character has incapacitated by another member of the crew, which continued until I realized that I probably wasn’t welcome to continue campaigning with the group. When I realized this, I genuinely felt really bad that I’d probably upset the group, but it wasn’t until now that I realized how seriously people take this.
I’ve never before played with the specific intent of keeping my character alive, but I think that was more of a videogame mentality. Other folks in the group aren’t exactly excited that I’m putting their characters lives on the line because people obviously invest real time and care into this. My realization was less that I joke too much and more that I don’t take things seriously enough.
That honestly doesn’t seem that bad. It might not be a smart thing to do in the grand scheme of things, but I can see it being an action that a naive member of the crew would do. I think if that truly was the wrong thing to do, then the GM should have stepped in and said something like “Are you sure about that? This region of space is notorious for having lots of pirates around”. Being shunned from a group for something like that feels a bit unreasonable, IMO.
I’m sure there was more to the story than that, but I’m an awkward person. Oh well. Live to try again another day, hopefully better and with more patience for people like me next time. Thanks again!
This is where setting rules or just finding a group who agree on the tone of a game is important. However, even in that some people will have things they do want to role play like shopping. Well be a good role player and make it interesting for them or even turn that shopping into something more. Ask the shopkeep if there’s anything he’s wanted that’s super rare (relic hunt quest), or straight up leave the store. It’s role playing go to a different part of town, you don’t spend 100% of your time irl with anyone why do that in a game? Cause havoc, or don’t, jump into the sewer, fascinate the locals by setting off fireworks or do spells, go to a bar get drunk and do role play karaoke while the guy shops. Have fun, it’s your role play too
You’d hate me. I’m somehow all of those points simultaneously
I’m so thankful that we have none of these people in my group. We’re all about the same, with similar interests, and similar play styles. The only drawback is that we all lean towards resolving situations diplomatically, which means our adventures can lack combat for quite a while, unless we’re in a straight-up dungeon. Eventually someone will get bored and go with “I stab him in the fucking face!” Which ends our diplomacy for a while.
Sounds remarkably similar to my group, but in our latest session it was a kpop video, not a dog
I long for a normal Dungeons and Dragons campaign with a nerdy elf wizard and a sneaky halfling rogue and a chivalrous human knight and a devout dwarven cleric being an adventuring party instead of a loose collection of ideas and concepts with no depth or cohesion. I want to be able to ask someone why they’re with the party and get an in-character answer instead of the player saying they need to be for the story to happen. I want the possibility of a TPK because the DM understands the characters and give us appropriate challenges, I don’t want any semblance of a challenge disappearing because the DM feels bad about dealing damage to his girlfriend’s character
I feel like I have either been, or met nearly every one of these.