I’ve worked 2nd (afternoon), swing (evening), and 3rd (overnight) shifts for the majority of my life. I recently moved into a training position where I’m Monday through Friday, 8am to ~5:30pm (I get OT while I’m cleaning up and writing reports).
As much as the 2nd/swing/3rd shifts screw with your life in other ways, the difficulty in scheduling any kind of life services outside of working hours is maddening. Doctor’s appointment? Nope. DMV? Maybe Saturday, if you’re lucky. Chaperone your kids field trip? Hahahhah no.
I don’t want to burn sick time for a doctor’s appointment (I need to save those for when my kid is actually sick), and I sure as hell don’t want to use up a “vacation” day for it. How tf are you supposed to get anything done?
It could always be worse. In much of Asia the standard work week is still 6 days per week. In China for example it’s often 9-9-6 which is 9am to 9pm 6 days per week.
This almost feels intentional though. If you’re working all the time you have less time to grow and realize how injust much of the world is.
I simply do not understand managers/supervisors/companies who do not realize that employees with a good life/work balance are more productive and less likely to leave. And be more expensive to replace.
I have three permanent work from home (but who come into the office for special occasions if they want) three that like to leave the jobs at the office when they go home so prefer to work in the office, and two who are a mix depending on what’s going on in their lives (both have young kids and bought houses recently).
My department is the envy of all the other exec managers; there is no gossip, no drama, no dissatisfaction. Like not bragging here, but seriously other departments point at mine and say to their boss “but they get to do that!”
But my gals and guys understand we have so much freedom specifically because we get our shit done and always cover for each other. And as long as that happens, my boss, the owner will continue to let me run my departments however I see fit.
It ain’t easy. You just gotta muscle through though. I do it through arthritic pain, and complain about it at length. But I don’t really have a choice in the matter.
That’s the neat part. You don’t.
Okay but really, you have to take time off.
Also depends on the country you’re in. In my case “sick leave” doesn’t have a limit. If you’re sick or you need to take care of someone who is, you just don’t work. There’s no day limit.
Also, if you need to go to a bank appointment or something like that, most places will either not even ask you to “recover” those hours or (at worst) you’ll just work an extra hour a few days.
At my place the hours are quite flexible. If I have a doctor’s appointment, I just go and make up for those hours somewhere in the week. Or if it’s longer I can also just take a few hours off instead of a whole day. And I have the luxury of a 36 hours contract now, so I have a weekday off every 2 weeks. I value free time more than money that I can’t enjoy because I’m working. But I’m aware that that’s definitely a luxury many people cannot afford across the pond (or even here). Many people in my bubble of higher educated people who started working in the past 5 years are not working full-time. Can’t easily run a 1 person household when you’re working 40 hours
Add kids and being chronically ill to that.
But honestly, you can find your place. I’d recommend not making your passion to your work as not to lose/spoil it but you need to at least like it. It’s tricky. So that at best work is still work, but not pissing you off all the time.
Then you’ll have the energy for other things too.
And regarding finding your place it can also be taken literally. Other countries work in very different ways, yours might not be the best fit for you. You take as given what the local options are, but there are others. I recall a video of an American who already knew Germany well but still his socks were blown off by the wildly different working environment here for example. (sick days? Wtf lol) it’s hard enough here for me with all these benefits, I literally would not have survived in the US for various reasons.
That might sound like an exaggeration but it’s not. It’s a fact due to my medical history. And if I had survived I’d be broke, but I’m not.
I communicated with my manager and came in late or left early. I’d usually do dental and medical appointments in the morning, and governmental stuff in the afternoon, but whatever I could schedule.
It helped that I was salaried, so the missing hours didn’t affect my take-home pay. But also, I could make up the hours by staying late, if needed.
I know this won’t work for everyone, and it would be good to change the system to work for more people.
Just do appointments or other stuff in the early morning or late afternoon. You don’t typically have to take the entire day off. Just an hour here or there.
Sometimes even then I still have to take an entire day off, but that is usually a very rare occasion.
have the same issue with making dental/medical appts, the managers are making it difficult and giving attitude.
All in all you’re just another brick in the wall.
We don’t. We just exist. And then we die. It’s monstrous.
Working from home helps but its also partly why I downsized to a condo a few years ago.
I worked in a callcentre for many years and had changing shifts every two weeks. Having to come in at 6am and then getting that switched to 4pm wreaked havoc on my body and after doing this for quite a while, I just crashed and got burnout.
Recovery took me two years, where I basically just slept. Five days a week are just too much, it’s a system designed to squeeze the last bit of labor value out of you and I fucking hated it. Nowadays, I’m not able to physically work for more than four days, or else I’ll crash again.
I had a lot of luck, so I can now work entirely from home. No commute, Fridays are off. Sounds super cozy and amazing, but the thing is: I need that Friday for myself. A lot of times I’ll just sleep so I can have some energy on the actual weekend.
When it comes to doctor’s appointments, I just tell my boss I have one and that’s it. As it should be. We are humans, not machines.
We don’t. We come home around 7 and start doing the bare minimum to keep up the household letting daycares and schools raise our kids.
We clean and cook and pay our bills then we go to sleep irritated and tired and sick of the rat race.
We have sex once or twice a month and go to fucking florida once a year. That’s it.
I see you, stranger. I hope you can find some flavor in the shit that life has become.
Until recently, I had a job where I could leave whenever I wanted so long as there was nothing urgent in motion and I didn’t have anything due/overdue.
My office was closed because the CEO thinks that my office’s workload can be handled by a team in Philippines using AI translation tools.





