I’m a mother of a kid about to launch… I’m astounded by your post. Idk how old you are but I think this might be your realisation that your family is dysfunctional (no judgement - my parents are the same) and they don’t really form attachments in the way you probably do. Save your peace. Build your life. If you want to do your duty and visit - stay in a hotel take everyone out for dinner and then leave and enjoy your holiday. Coming home should be like being king for a day - everyone loves you and misses you and makes time to see you (unlike in real day to day life when you wouldn’t be prioritised like that if you moved back). It’s not normal for your mother to be expecting cash for car rides like that. I’m sure if your brother was that hard up for cash you would offer but it’s a couple dollars. I’m sorry your having this experience.

What industries? Because we’re in tech/law-finance and we have found it’s a lot closer to 30%.

Sometimes to live better you have to love from afar.

Sometimes the people we love don’t being anything to our lives but complications.

Your both loving children. You have tried. Have a happy relationship and if you want kids make a family with better emotional skills. Your not a bad person