Frickin’ vegans…

You’re here to pass the butter.

Today’s my last day at this job before starting a new job on Monday. In addition to making the rounds and discovering how much people have appreciated my time and will miss me, one of my favorite people I deliver to gave me a painting she had made for me that will now be the first decoration at my new desk.

The internet definition, yes. Because you’ll get a bunch of people who are diagnosed who think that since they have ADHD, everything they do is a symptom so they’ll spread some things that’s just basic human nature.

In the real world, it’s defined just right. The problem there is that people will ignore the “interfering with daily activities/life” part. Sure, everyone is distracted or hyperfocused sometimes, but for us it’s more of a constant issue that we have to find ways to get around to function in society. Or people will look at something like executive dysfunction and think “yeah, sometimes I don’t want to <insert name of task no one wants to do>” because they can’t comprehend the hell of having to force yourself to do the things you love.

I liken it to someone saying “I’m so OCD” just because they put their pens in a desk drawer. No man, OCD wrecks people. You’ve just finally decided to be slightly neat.

There are no backup failures in Ba Sing Se

Next stage is some amount of time away from video games.

The stage after that is nostalgia: someone will mention one of the games you loved back in the day and you’ll think “That was when I was happiest. I should find out how to play that again.”

Then you’ll find some way to play it, whether by cobbling together some emulation software or buying some As Seen on TV handheld game that includes your game and a hundred others.

You’ll scratch a little bit of the itch, but decide to start checking out the current video game scene.

Once you realize everything now is too flashy and fast and annoying or it has some dreaded multiplayer requirement that you no longer have enough friends to fulfill and the public rooms of the game are filled with a bunch of children.

Eventually, you’ll stumble into the future’s version of Stardew Valley and be content just building quiet little worlds by yourself.

That still sounds like Andy Dick

“After all, just look at what AI did for me in this photo!”

This is soup for my family!

Do jump scares count as surprises? If so, then frequently.

“Now everyone please turn to document number 43298 in your packet entitled ‘Facts About Your Mother.’”

Well sure, if you don’t take the ferry

The superior way is to eat it like corn on the cob. Start at the pointier end and chew straight back to the mangonus. Don’t forget to smother it in butter after shucking the husk.

And pizza on Fridays

I assume every one of these is just the song “Muskrat Love.”

Yeah, I’ve never seen any of his videos but I know his name when I see his face, know he has a candy bar, and some kind of TV competition on Prime. I’d put him up there as at least the same kind of famous as Kardashians.

At least now I’ll be able to outfit my current American Girl dolls with some proper shoes instead of the current garbage out there.

“You are a babbling fool and we have built a temple to madness.”

Well, yours has been up for over four hours so you should call a doctor.

POWER WORD KILL!