You’re getting downvoted unfairly here. Yes, it’s the “right” choice to maximize the time with your kids when you can as those moments will go by faster than we think they will, but it’s also not the wrong choice to make sure you take care of yourself. Every parent is going to make their own decisions, and nobody’s “doing it wrong” as long as the child is reasonably happy and healthy (to the extent uncontrollable forces allow). We’re all just getting along here.
I can say that I have frequently gone through this very situation with my kids, where I’ve had to tell myself that I won’t be able to have this kind of time forever. And it’s not that I actually didn’t want to do it — I wanted to do be around my kid and see them be their wonderful self. I almost always would come away with something they did that brought me joy. It’s just that with young kids, there’s so much stuff to deal with all the time, you always wish you had a bit more time purely for yourself.
But it’s sort of like when you go on a big vacation, and you venture out and fill every day with activities and adventure. Maybe some mornings you feel like just watching TV at the hotel after so many days of activities, but you power through it because there are things you still want to do, and this vacation will be over before you know it.
There’s a wide distance between supervising a young child responsibly (which obviously must be done at all times) and engaging in play (which you should do when you can and you’ll be glad you did, but if you just don’t have it in you, it’s not a crime to sit quietly for a few minutes).
Parenting is a 24/7 job. You need to take your breaks while on the clock because you’re never off the clock. Paying someone for childcare services is a job with a start and end time. You can take your breaks before or after. The expectations are different because the jobs are different.
I’m living through this right now. I don’t need anyone else to tell me anything. My partner and I alternate on childcare while the other person handles other household duties and day job duties. Our parents come by regularly to help out and we use that time to catch up on sleep as best as we can. Paying for childcare doesn’t make sense as it just negates most of one person’s income. If I’m going to be working anyway and not resting, I’d much rather put that energy towards my kid and have less money than be away but have sightly more money.
I don’t think that’s really comparable, a parent isn’t being paid, a babysitter can choose not to babysit. And besides, it really depends on what the kid’s asking to do. I’ve definitely been told I can’t do things when I was being babysat.
You’re getting downvoted unfairly here. Yes, it’s the “right” choice to maximize the time with your kids when you can as those moments will go by faster than we think they will, but it’s also not the wrong choice to make sure you take care of yourself. Every parent is going to make their own decisions, and nobody’s “doing it wrong” as long as the child is reasonably happy and healthy (to the extent uncontrollable forces allow). We’re all just getting along here.
I can say that I have frequently gone through this very situation with my kids, where I’ve had to tell myself that I won’t be able to have this kind of time forever. And it’s not that I actually didn’t want to do it — I wanted to do be around my kid and see them be their wonderful self. I almost always would come away with something they did that brought me joy. It’s just that with young kids, there’s so much stuff to deal with all the time, you always wish you had a bit more time purely for yourself.
But it’s sort of like when you go on a big vacation, and you venture out and fill every day with activities and adventure. Maybe some mornings you feel like just watching TV at the hotel after so many days of activities, but you power through it because there are things you still want to do, and this vacation will be over before you know it.
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There’s a wide distance between supervising a young child responsibly (which obviously must be done at all times) and engaging in play (which you should do when you can and you’ll be glad you did, but if you just don’t have it in you, it’s not a crime to sit quietly for a few minutes).
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Parenting is a 24/7 job. You need to take your breaks while on the clock because you’re never off the clock. Paying someone for childcare services is a job with a start and end time. You can take your breaks before or after. The expectations are different because the jobs are different.
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I’m living through this right now. I don’t need anyone else to tell me anything. My partner and I alternate on childcare while the other person handles other household duties and day job duties. Our parents come by regularly to help out and we use that time to catch up on sleep as best as we can. Paying for childcare doesn’t make sense as it just negates most of one person’s income. If I’m going to be working anyway and not resting, I’d much rather put that energy towards my kid and have less money than be away but have sightly more money.
I don’t think that’s really comparable, a parent isn’t being paid, a babysitter can choose not to babysit. And besides, it really depends on what the kid’s asking to do. I’ve definitely been told I can’t do things when I was being babysat.
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