(caught the spelling mistake afterwards ugh)

  • Widdershins@lemmy.world
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    10 hours ago

    Join my gym program it’s called LB Fatness. You sign up for this gym scam, cancel immediately using a fake card number so they don’t get a dime, and as time goes on joining the gym will become too expensive. If you can’t afford to get scammed you won’t get scammed. Workouts include carrying a fat wallet, riding a bike outdoors in air that smells like car exhaust and not sweat, and lifting cinderblocks while sitting on a weathered piano bench outside on a patch of dirt. Front yard is optional dirt patch is not. You gotta buy yourself a bike and a few cinderblocks but the piano bench should show up on garbage day on a curb somewhere eventually. Just keep an eye out and you’ll see one sooner than you’d think.

    Send me your CC#, a photo with your shirt off, and home address and I’ll order you clothes that are just a little too small but otherwise look great and will slowly shrink in the wash.