Unless she is holding a Sharpie, in which case you probably have a dick on your chest (in my experience)
No one I’ve ever been with has drawn shapes on my chest, so I can’t speak as to that … But my chest hair grows in a triangle and several of my partners have suggested that I shave an “S” or a bat shape into it. Does that count?
No, they were right
Oh, I’m sorry that you don’t actually enjoy her company. Maybe reevaluate what you want in life.
That’s a lot of words and blame shifting to admit you’re emotionally stunted.
May I suggest that misogynists fuck each other and leave women alone?
As a gay I’m all for that.
If the fascists just gave in and fucked each other it would solve a lot of problems.
Fascists only get off when they are fucking someone over maliciously.
So the best defence is wearing a gimp suit saying “oh yeah fuck me over, big boy”
I would like to nominate a change of nomenclature. I motion that we start saying “I am so gay for that” for stuff that we are both in favor of and have strong homosexual (or at very least nonheteronormative) feelings for. Like gay crimes and stuff.
YOU KNOw they fantasize or jerk of to porn that do.
“Would you love me if I was a worm?”
Do all y’all really not know how to respond to that? It’s like being asked if worm batman could beat up worm superman of your heart. Now that’s a question.
“I would if I was a bird.”
If you were a worm, I’d be a bird so I could eat you all over again
My boyfriend said “no”. When I asked him why, he said “Because you are a worm.” I acted very offended (which I really wasn’t) and I told him that I would love him if he was a worm. He said I was lying, which was true.
We just thought it was very funny and both knew it was a joke. If this is a serious question from someone, then you have a problem I think. That would be ridiculous and immature. It is probably best not to answer then but to ask the question back. Then the person that asked the question has the problem, not you.
When she’s about to ask geometry questions and you just want to enjoy the moment.
I always wanted to bang Pythagoras
Fill me with the volume of your cylinder!!! Tell me the volume!!!
Flip the script, play with her tiddies and then ask her if she ever thinks about how all the stars in the universe will burn out one day and then the universe will go on existing for far longer than the entire time that the universe had light. Then motorboat her tiddies while she thinks.
are you my husband? JFC 😂
I think the image implies that the questions are something big and heavy, likely pertaining to the relationship itself, but when I do this, it’s usually something a bit random and abstract.
For instance, earlier today, I asked my partner “if you were a God in a pantheon of many different Gods, what would your domain be? I reckon we wouldn’t be especially powerful Gods, so it’d have to be something fairly specific — sort of like how [in Dungeons and Dragons], Azuth is the God of magic as a craft, existing as a lesser God within Mystra’s domain of magic in general”
this type of question is how i interpreted this meme. like the question was gonna be some “who would win, superman or goku” type shit LOL
Why can’t I find partners who ask questions like that? We’d never run out of things to talk about.
It took me a long while to find someone who actually appreciated weird stuff like this. There are plenty of folk like us out in the world, it just takes some time to find them sometimes.
When I look up fictional characters with my Meyers Briggs type it’s literally all Loki, mercury, foxes, and other trickster spirits, and like 20 different versions of Lucifer so
what do I want to be the God of? Whiskey or chocolate.
What would I actually be the God of? Meandering answers to simple questions.
Blasphemy, convergent evolution, atheism, and nachos/queso dip
girl bad
When you nut in her and she has the nerve to be askin questions am i right.
Watcha thinkin’ bout?
It seems pretty clearly like a “what not to do at a stoplight”-style joke about unhealthy interpersonal behavior. Like it’s calling out a real pattern you may not have noticed and then, as a subversion, providing the most insecure, manchildish response to it.
Edit: To be more concrete, my interpretation of the takeaway is that if your partner is doing this shapes thing, they might have something on their mind, and maybe you should ask them if they do. (And the joke to make you realize that is to juxtapose you getting up and leaving like Patrick Bateman.)
Too much nuance we have to be outraged about everything around here
Or if they have something to say, they can just say it.
Sometimes asking something is just hard, man. Nobody’s saying it’s your responsibility to ask or that they can’t ask on their own, but that it might comfort the person struggling to get something off their chest if you express that you’re open to it. It’s not coddling in some zero-sum game; it’s just trying to be in-tune with how your partner’s feeling.
I do find it uncanny how consistently this happens. I won’t speculate as to why or if it’s good or bad - but I do find it really off-putting when I’m trying to relax and recuperate after sex, and suddenly I’m getting slapped with some existential question or interrogation about the nature of our relationship (even after getting married).
“Would you still love me if I was a worm?”
Sure. I’d love to take you fishing!
She’s asking if you love her independently of what she brings to the table. Do you love “her for her”. Answer the worm question from that perspective and she’ll be reassured and love it.
No she’s being Brian rotted by stupid fucking shit on tiktok and needs to get off social media. Is what needs to actually happen.
Brian rotted
That Brian guy is such a piece of shit.
This was a question women asked before social media existed. If you want to be successful at life you need to learn to communicate with people who communicate differently than you do.
How would I even communicate or connect with a worm about anything? That makes no sense.
Get in a sleeping bag. Roll around for a while. Think.
Wether you’re a red wiggler creating compost for me or a common worm i dig up to fish, you’ll always be by my side.
‘r one a dem biguns, what’s good fer eatin’
“Would you still love me if I was a pedant?”
Be happy she gives a shit, if you’re not careful one day the questions will stop coming.
Men tend to get sleepy after sex, whereas women are more likely to become more alert and/or mentally stimulated. I think it’s prolactin release that makes men sleepy, though I’m unsure of the potential mechanism behind women becoming more awake.
If you haven’t shared with your partner/wife that this is off-putting for you, you should tell her. I think it would be reasonable to say that whilst you understand that questions like this are likely how your partner/wife decompresses after sex, that you would appreciate 5-10 minutes of quiet so that you’re able to recuperate also
Because women’s main sex organ is our brains so when our brains get stimulated they tend to perk up
It’s also why lesbian sex can go on and on and on for actual hours (with breaks of course)
I think there’s more to it than this. In my experience, sapphic sex is less focussed around orgasm, which means there’s often periods where the sex/making out is sort of enjoying the good vibes (no pun intended).
In contrast, men that I have slept with can become overly fixated on the idea of me orgasming, which always annoys me because I’m quite difficult to bring to orgasm, and they don’t seem to get that orgasm != good sex (they’re certainly correlated ofc, but one doesn’t necessarily mean the other).
Women also tend to take much longer to reach orgasm, which can mean that sapphic sex tends to be quite dynamic in terms of positions, tempo, use of toys etc… Like, if I’m going down on a partner who can only orgasm through oral sex, and I know that the position I’m in will start causing me pain before she’s anywhere near orgasming, then I might opt to switch things up to be in a position that’s restful for me (so I can resume oral afterwards) but still stimulating for my partner.
TL;DR: I think the biochemical wakefulness can’t hurt, but I think sapphic sex going on for hours is mostly sociocultural
Hetero sex can too
It certainly can, but it’s far from typical. Whereas it’s not uncommon for lesbian/sapphic sex to last for hours, such that I’m pretty confident that the average duration of sapphic sex is going to be much higher than the average duration of heterosexual sex
Such a shame when sex toys talk
This is when you ask them if they have any friends they would like to invite into your sexcapades.
“Hun, would you rather get $1 million dollars in a year or get $1 in a million years?”
The latter, that would kind of guarantee mankind didn’t destroy the planet. Could also mean I’ll be doomed to survive that long as a ghoul though…
Ok boomer
That or montage leading to her prolonged cancer death.
That got dark quick.
Oh shit, are we in a movie?
Always have been 🌎👨🚀🔫👨🚀
Nah, a cruel and unjust lord decapitated her after she humiliated some of his corrupt tax collectors. Now you’re trying to unify Japan.
