- cross-posted to:
- programmerhumor@lemmy.ml
- cross-posted to:
- programmerhumor@lemmy.ml
We’re missing the most important rule here. Did the nephew open a ticket?
I legitimately can’t tell if this is a joke or some dude trying to do a humble brag post on LinkedIn. So many ‘look what I can do’ posts on that damn site.
No one that serious about network security wouldn’t already have a network dedicated to untrusted devices relatives could use. Definite joke, still entertaining 😂
LinkedIn is Poe’s Law for corporatism made into a lifestyle.
Guest vlan? Smart.
Blocking 80/443 knowing all to well everything depends on those: evil.
Throttling to 56k: the original original poster just being a dick.
Took 45 minutes: Maybe find another job. You’re not good at it.
Conclusion: The sister was right. Evil incompetent dick.
I mean fuck me, i can build an entire bespoke DDU from bare metal to cool down in less time than that.
I have a feeling this is satire, and I’m usually the type of person to miss the joke and think it’s genuine
Took 45 minutes: Maybe find another job. You’re not good at it.
Bit harsh.
The OpenWRT guest wifi guide isn’t a simple switch like you would get on your OEM router, but involves manually setting up a bridge device, a new firewall zone, and a new AP on one of your radios.
This can take some time if you want to do things the right way. 10 minutes to setup with no extra config steps. Add another 10 if you need to move around your firewall rules, and another 20 for random debugging.
https://openwrt.org/docs/guide-user/network/wifi/guestwifi/configuration_webinterface
Although, you set it up once. After that it’s just a checkbox.
and of course you need to tag the new network on all your switches, routers, APs… not to forget testing and integration in your monitoring system. 45 minutes is absolutely fine.
Oh true , hadn’t thought about that - I just assumed it was a single device
I feel like when ‘Zero Trust’ first became a thing, the theme was ‘you should have every endpoint under your control hardened so it need not feer untrusted peers being able to connect’. E.g. if you think you absolutely need VPN to a ‘private network’ for security, then you are failing to be hardened in a ‘zero trust’ way, because you implicitly fear that your systems would fall to untrusted peers.
I feel like it’s evolved to ‘don’t let anything be able to connect to anything under your control unless you have admin privilege over it as well’. Which is particularly a nightmare when you try to collaborate between two companies, each balking at the other’s hard requirement to have admin access to all network peers of interest.
The real question is : Why did you invite anyone over, before having a guest VLAN set up ? Classic beginner mistake.
Sounds like the network people at my company. They are asking us to spend more time in the office, but they don’t provide enough desks, they don’t provide working wired LAN and they only provide semi-working Wifi. All with proxies that don’t work and filters that don’t let me access the webapp I am supposed to maintain, which is blocked for “being a commercial website”. Thanks, I know, I have to program that crap.
I have two seperate guest VLANs, one for my family, and one for the people I love.
Whatever happened to just talking to each other? I’m glued to my devices all day every day, yet even I ignore the phone during holiday family gatherings.
Nobody’s forcing you to go; if you prefer be on the internet rather than interacting with your family, please just stay home.
Edit: Downvotes be damned, I stand by what I said. If this asocial shut-in who hasn’t had a friend since 2014 (because people annoy me) can come out of my shell a few times a year, and spend some time with the people I grew up, so can you. No excuses.
One day they will all be dead or estranged, and you will regret not looking up from your phone for two hours to spend quality time with them when they were alive and in your life, as you die alone in your nursing home (assuming you’re rich enough to afford assisted living, that is). Don’t say you aren’t warned.
Most people feel obligated to at least pretend they like their family.
Don’t worry, you’ll eventually get over your feelings of obligations towards others before you reach 40. Life becomes a lot less stressful once you stop giving a fuck about being a people-pleaser.
For me, i felt like that also when I was 35. I didnt want my family to be in my life since I didnt feel good around them.
Now at 50, I have again connected to some of them. Because you get back to those feelings that life is not endless and you start to think about that you will one day not be here anymore. And its nicer if that happens when you have made peace with at least some of those people.
Tldr, age made me think different at different stages. Maybe it happens for others as well. :)
It changes one kind of stress for another in a lot of cases. If you annoy everyone you come into contact with, you end up alone, which isn’t great for your mental health, and turns every interaction into an annoyance, so you end up stressed by the necessity of interacting with people you don’t want to interact with. There is no escape from humanity when you are human.
what a dick move tbh. i get ya wanna be secure, but why not just let him do his thing on that alternate network?
guess this is satire. zero trust and byod mix well, just isolate from your shit and you are done. block port 25 outgoing and known c2 IPs to not taint your IP.
Kid should be learning social skills at a family party.
As a former kid struggling with social skills, I think that would’ve done me some good. It’s easy and convenient to fall into avoidance behaviour, but overcoddling did me no favours.
I was told overcoddling reduces resiliency. Parents always coming in to fix things without letting their kids try to solve it on their own. The kid may fail but the act of trying and figuring out why it failed helps greatly. Most parents just “don’t want to see their kids upset” though.
Take it with a grain of salt, as I don’t have any kids.
Guys a madman, didn’t even ask for a ticket.
45 minutes setting up an alt vlan?
Was he getting paid by the hour?
The experience of managing a consumer-grade LAN appliance:
Open web browser
Start typing 192.168.0.1
It auto-inserts 192.168.0.12 because that’s the IP address of your NAS, and you’ve logged into it to adjust something at some point in the last six months. You register it has done this as you’re releasing the Enter key.
click Back.
Type the IP address again, this time carefully deleting the 2 it oh so helpfully inserted.
Wait 3 to 5 business weeks while the 16-bit ARM microcontroller they put in these things serves a web page like old people fuck. It loads to a completely useless stats page that has no information that anyone has ever needed to know.
Click LAN Setup.
Wait 3 to 5 business weeks while the 16-bit ARM microcontroller they put in these things serves a web page like old people fuck.
Parse the wall of acronyms before you, click the link that says DHCP.
Wait 3 to 5 business weeks while the 16-bit ARM microcontroller they put in these things serves a web page like old people fuck.
It continues in that fashion until you get what you need done or your network stops working and you have to get a pen and press the Reset button on the back of the device.
It auto-inserts 192.168.0.12 because that’s the IP address of your NAS, and you’ve logged into it to adjust something at some point in the last six months. You register it has done this as you’re releasing the Enter key.
I avoid this by having my router interface on 1) a double digit IP. And 2) a non-standard port
IT professional doesn’t have local DNS? LOL
Wait 3 to 5 business weeks while the 16-bit ARM microcontroller they put in these things serves a web page like old people fuck.
This also goes for some NAS appliances and the in-dash console of newer cars. Underpowered ARM implementations are the scourge of this decade.
Imagine not having an opnsense firewall deployed as an IT professional
This is just Uncle BOFH.
Lol wtf? Why even spend 45 minutes doing that if you’re going to completely block those ports?
Just tell him “no”.
Throtting and port blocking is for housemates who pissed you off, not nephews.
“oh I’m trying to fix it just give me a few more minutes away from everyone” lights joint
It’s about sending a message.
Allowing children on roblox is negligence at this point so I think this is unironically in the right
The American use “ironically” is probably the only difference between our dialects that I’ll stand firm on.
My friends, we already have a use for the word, and it’s not this!
I’m all about linguistic innovation, but using “unironically” in place of “seriously” and “ironically” in place of “sarcastically”/”not seriously" is not happy times for me.
Unless you give me a new word for irony.
I quite like y’all, I use that all the time, not against Americanisms in general, just this one.
To me, the original post was riddled with literary irony - they were saying things whose words meant one thing but the overall post was actually making fun of the ideas the words were presenting.
My comment serves to state that I agree with the point the words are making and not the meaning through the lens of irony. Ie, unironically.
Cambridge dictionary 2nd definition of irony
irony noun [U] (TYPE OF SPEECH) the use of words that are the opposite of what you mean, as a way of being funny
I respect the pushback though. I have similar gripes with “sarcasm” being used when “irony” is correct and vice versa.
hey don’t blame us, we learned it from the brits
Oh interesting, I hadn’t noticed that!
yeah playing with the three types of irony was extremely popular in early 1700s britlit. early american lit tried to distinguish itself from britlit by focusing less on irony and more on allegory and symbolism. however by the late 1800s american lit came to emphasize irony almost as hard as the previous century’s britlit had, though i think our only author to really do as much verbal irony (saying one thing, meaning another) as that era of britlit was F Scott Fitzgerald in the 1920s.
i’m curious now how Australian literature plays with irony. if there’s an absence of verbal irony, is there more literary irony (the consequences of the action are tied comically to the action) and dramatic irony (the audience knows things the characters don’t)? and did the divergence happen because our war of independence resulted in the brits no longer using our southern colonies as a penal colony just as they were getting bored of this?
or were early Australians more likely to reject this device because they felt it was a signifier of their oppressors?
Deleting Roblox and installing Factorio
You’ll thank me when you’re older, kid.
The factory must grow.
“Why is my child applying to Nestle’s child mines”
he yearns
Older? Poor kid might forget to eat or drink water if you get him hooked on Factorio
How often do you eat water?
Pedant version: [eat || (drink water)]
In my generation, we lived on Mountain Dew and Cheetos, and look at the Sim Cities we built.
Look on my works Sim Mayor and

Paying for Factorio and letting their engineering career pay for your retirement home is way cheaper than saving for retirement!
I refuse to allow my own child on it. It takes zero effort to see all the super shady shit happening there. I wont have my child exposed to that crap.
I played Roblox with my kids for years and didn’t find any shady shit. Not saying there is no shady stuff on there, but after 100s of hours either it’s suddenly gotten worse, we somehow dodged all the shady shit or the media have exaggerated the issue. Take your pick.
I played with my kids because they desperately wanted to join in on the fun but the reports of it being pedo land made me create a rule of “you only play when we play together”. We had great fun, have many fond memories of our time on there.
You definitely dodged the shady shit with that rule. Not just pedo land either, also the illegal child labor.
When my kids were younger I treated the internet like a large room full of strangers of all kinds good and bad. I wouldn’t let my 8yr old wonder around on her own there so why would I on social media or multiplayer games.
This kind of reads like a catholic who brought their kids to mass their whole childhood and disbelieves that catholic priests are child molestors because they never molested your child. They don’t prey on children with present caring parents who don’t leave their children unsupervised. They prey on solitary, neglected, vulnerable children, or for catholics those who are willing to trust a priest alone with them. In roblox it’s the same but without the implicit trust of an authority figure. The pedos probably avoided you. You didn’t somehow dodge the shady shit, you inadvertently created a bubble of safety that prevented your kids from being preyed upon because there’s so much easier prey around.
That’s an odd way to twist it. I must have had “parent” tagged to my avatar so to avoid the nasties.
My sister-in-law let her 10 year old daughter play it with zero supervision. When we found out we told her she should be watching what her daughter’s doing so she went in to check and found the kid talking to some grown man from Azerbaijan.
I’ll admit it. I can feel that vibe and I don’t totally disagree.
I’ve only ever met two types of IT professional. Either:
- Their home network is immaculate and smooth as butter. It connects quickly and integrates with everything. They can manage it all from their phone, but they don’t have to because it’s all automated. Their server room (a) exists and (b) is cable managed. There’s a wireless access point and connected smart speaker in every room, including the garage and the back patio, but they’re carefully located for maximum sound coverage and to prevent signal interference. Their home theater is substantially better than a movie theater, and their media server is packed to the gills with content. Network security is hardened, with bespoke subnets for every user and tunneling for the media server and smart home functions. You feel a sense of calm and ease when connected to their network. “Everything I do at work, I try out at home first.”
Or:
- Their “home network” is a single Belkin router from 2011. They’ve had it since college, and it takes 9 minutes to reboot (which they have to do daily). It doesn’t even have Tomato on it and still uses the default password. They still watch OTA TV and Blu-Rays, so the wifi is exclusively connected to the smart switch that their tea kettle is plugged into so they can start their hot water before they come downstairs. You feel guilty even asking for the wifi password. “Why would I do any network stuff here? I do IT all day at work, the last thing I want to do is even touch a Cat5 cable at home.”
“Everything I do at work, I try out at home first.”
Absolutely no fucking way! And anything that touches work is isolated, their opsec sucks so much they didn’t even realized they mandate “security solutions” with known backdoors.
I think it means they setup new tech on their homelab to learn how everything works and how to break it. Then when a problem arises where one of these solutions is needed at work, you can implement it without any large issues. It makes sense if your hobby is close to or adjacent your day job, and you are on Salary, and your boss treats you right.
Yes, I’m not doing almost any of the things we do at work in my network.
I’m absolutely not running the same software. I’m not organizing the information the same way. I’m not using the same infrastructure abstraction, and even less configuring it in any similar way. I’m not writing the same languages.
The work environment is dictated by consensus between many people, with varying expertise, and weighted by how much work one is willing to put into each aspect of it. Each of those parts lead to bad tech, even though they lead to good people organization.
You are telling me that you can’t proof of concept something without a matching tech stack? Or learn exactly how a new tech works? It also sounds like you should never give your work any of your personal time, you won’t gain anything except for more work.
Our opsec is pretty well managed, but I try to squeeze anything I’d need at home to work tasks. I get paid to learn the stuff at work and then I can just implement it on my own environment.
Isn’t this basically just rich IT guy vs poor IT guy?
No, it’s 'my life is IT and i never stop working" guy, and “IT is just my job” guy.
I just order a new router on Black Friday to replace my 10 year old one. I also only console game now because PC gaming is too much of a headache. I spend my money on outdoor gear and pets, not technology. My new router is $90 bucks. I can’t fathom why I’d ever need a wifi 7 quad band router with 9Gbps of throughput for a home network, other than pure bragging rights. All my devices are like 5-10 years old and barely support wifi 6 anyway.
A couple of my co-workers are the former. They will be doing penetration testing at 2am form their home lab in the morning because they their default mode is work work work. If i’m up at 2 am i’m watching TV and snacking.
I monitor security updates, but my co-workers like get excited and ramble on anytime a new patch/attack is documented. I don’t get it. They revel in doing updates and rebuilding their VMs fresh every few weeks, I groan and clone.
Nah, I could afford nice shit but I’m still using a ubiquity edge router 8 from 10 years ago.
There is probably something to be said that there is an in between to those two extremes. The “my network is made of a Hodgepodge of shit my employer threw out that still seems to work and brand new things I replaced because I had to”
My first draft of this did mention that there was a version of the second type of IT guy who cobbled everything together with workplace castoffs and conference swag, but I couldn’t figure out how to make it work without just being over-wordy.
Maybe more like fresh IT guy vs. seasoned (=old) IT guy
The guy she tells you not to worry about VS you.
I’m in the meme. In the shitty paragraph.
Are you my boyfriend/roommate?
Edit: he and I are both IT folks, but he handles all the Windows issues in the house. I handle Linux issues. He handles the router because it’s closer to his desk so it’s easier for him to threaten.
That seems optimal, I would be terrified at the thought of a Windows admin touching me.
no, just me, gabe newell
I want to be the first, but I am definitely closer to the second. I’m trying to find a reasonable middle ground.
Like, I want to have a nice home network with a proper NAS, Pihole DNS, Plex/Emby/Jellyfin media server, all my music properly tagged, little mediaplayer/emulation/game streaming endpoint boxes on each TV, etc. But I don’t have the time or money to do it right at the moment.
So I have my desktop set up to share out my media folders as SMB shares when it’s powered on, and I’ve used a few tools to get my video content organized right for Kodi. I’ve got Kodi installed as an app on the Xbox Series X plugged into the family room TV. The other TV has a Chromecast dongle with VLC sideloaded and set up to connect to the SMB shares, because I’m too lazy to get my Kodi setup on it. Every room in the house has an ethernet port, and most rooms have a dumb switch so as much hardware can have ethernet connection as possible. I’ve run my music collection through MusicBrainz Picard, and separated it into a properly tagged and organized folder, and one for stuff that isn’t.
I used to be the first, but because of a shitty landlord I was forced to move, and I only had 30 days to find a place. I bought a house because no one would rent to me with a large dog and she’s been with us for 10 years now.’my homelab is sitting disassembled in the basement with nowhere to even plug it in, because in order to get an outlet wired I’d have to replace my entire breaker box which is probably hanging on by a thread. I’m too house poor to even consider getting the work done over paying the bills I need to and providing my kid with food and clothing.
The place is nice enough and my family lives well, but I was the first guy and now I have to be the second guy for who knows how long.
In other words; fuck landlords
Well I sit kind of between these
Like I’m not getting a dedicated router and have no server room in my apartment, and my consumer router only supports two VLANs (main and guest). But I’d say the rest is rather sophisticated with all machines defined in my NixOS config, including automated generation of firewall and reverse proxy rules for which I wrote custom modules.
Media server isn’t super full but connected to jellyseer and the rest of the stack, accessible over TLS (Let’s Encrypt certificates) only, with the option to have users managed via IDM.
However, I only have devices on my network that I somewhat trust, with an Android TV box being the worst offender. The smart TV was never connected to my network.
Would be cool to isolate my work PCs somewhat (I work from home with company provided equipment) but it’s just not worth the trouble in my opinion. Not switching out a low power device that does most for two different devices that both use more power (since you usually need a router and a modem).
deleted by creator
I’m almost the first (I run multiple VLANs and SSIDs using pfSense and Ubiquiti hardware) but my server is an old PC sitting under my desk and my cable management strategy is mostly “out of sight, out of mind”. I’m also heavily invested in the Apple ecosystem, especially for smart home stuff, so not everything is open source. Basically I have a complex network setup because I actually make use of it, but I really don’t enjoy working on it and if there’s an easy solution, I’ll go for it.
For the smart stuff: HomeAssistant
It is life changing once you get it running.
I got already 5 vendors and 3 different communications (BT, Matter, WiFi) integrated.
It truly is awesome
I’m in the middle. At work, I play it fairly conservative, applying well established solutions to well-known problems.
I have friends whom I advise and assist with their networks that absolutely fall into the first category.
MY network is is like the lab of a mad scientist, everything tinkered with right up to the edge of breaking. My home router collapses multiple times a year due to the wonky chaos I ask it to do. Home automaton sequences that are more complex than most rube goldberg machines. Metaphorical sharp edges and loose clutter everywhere, but an unholy abomination that works better than it has any right to - until I scrap it all to rebuild it from scratch next week.
I spent way more time than I care to think about figuring out how to get my porch lights to come on at 7am and turn off 10 minutes before sunrise without breaking when sunrise happened before 7am. I tried some serious Rube Goldberg nonsense in multiple iterations, until finally I decided to just add another “turn off the lights” at 9am every day. Most of the time it doesn’t do anything because the lights are already off, but on DST day it accomplishes my goal of making sure they don’t run all day, since 9am is always after sunrise.
If you’re using home assistant there is a “sun” integration.
My lights turn on 30 minutes before sunset and turn off 30 minutes after sunrise.
My wife didn’t want them turning on and off at the same time every day because observers could see the pattern… at least this way it’s a little more hidden.
(Side note, I just realized I said the times slightly wrong. We actually wanted it on at 6:30 and off 15 minutes before sunrise.)
Yeah, I had it turning off before sunrise just fine. The problem is that we didn’t want to turn them on until 6:30, but on the longest day of the year, sunrise actually happens at 6:14, which means that the lights would get the signal to turn off before they got the signal to turn on, which would mean that the lights would stay on all day until the night automation turned them back off again at 10pm. Which…probably doesn’t make a difference, but it would bug my totally-not-neurodivergent brain.
Anyway, I don’t use Home Assistant, but that’s probably the one I’ll choose the next time I move.
Yep. You can also use the sun’s position in the sky as well; I had one of the AIs write up the YAML.
Light sensor trigger?
The porch lights in question are actually string lights, and I just assumed that the power outlet they’re plugged into was too deep on the porch for a light sensor to be reliable. I could definitely be wrong, though.
I work on this shit daily… it’s fucking infuriating…why on God’s green earth would I want to spin up a bunch of shit that’s gonna give me more hassle than its worth, for free, when I can just…not, ya know?
I’ll take option 2
For all the AI hate on this website y’all couldn’t figure out this was written by it? This is ChatGPT in particular.
Or, wait, are you saying that my original comment that you’re replying to is ChatGPT? Because…lol, sadly, no, I’m just like this. “This” meaning pretty much everything I write is way too overwrought.
Or just copypasta.
I figured it was made up (“@it_unprofession” probably ran out of content ages ago), but it doesn’t look like actual AI content to me. The sentences are too short, for one thing.
What idiot IT specialist does not run a segregated VLAN for guest wifi access? That is just rude.
And separate wifi networks that are connected to different vpns from around the world.
A broke one.





















